Sooshi with Greg
February 6th 2006 @ 4:30 pm All Categories

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A few weeks ago, I took my buddy, Greg, out to sushi for his birthday.

We went to the same restaurant where he took me last year for my birthday, Sushi Zen, which is located on first street outside of downtown San Jose.

We sat at the sushi bar, joining some other people who were all seated around the bar. I brought Farah along, and so we sat at the sushi bar with me on one side, Greg on the other, and Farah in between. The place was lively and everyone was having a good time. We ordered up, started with a couple large Sake’s and a some beer. Greg asked for Tsingtao, to which the waitress replied, “We don’ serve Chine’ be’r”. Greg, of course, mishears her and replies with, “What! you don’t serve Chinese here!? What do you do, beat the shit out of them!?!?!” The waitress is taken aback and I immediately step in with, “uh, uh, a large Sapporo is fine, thanks!”. We also ordered up some various sushi from the Sushi bar host and it was served sporadically throughout the evening. While chugging the Sapporo and Sake, Greg, being that this is the first time meeting Farah, charmingly inquired about her and her history, Farah obliged and I got some more dirt about her life without having to give her the third degree myself. While we were chatting, the hosts at the sushi bar handed out to everyone at the bar, little cucumbers carved into shotglasses that were full of some mystery liquor. After everyone had one, the hosts made a toast, and we all gulped it down… None of us new what the Hell we drank, but it was tasty, kind of sake like, and really, who cares, it was free booze and we got to eat the cucumber cup!

In between Farah revealing her history, plus reminiscent Greg and Sean stories, another Sapporo and large Sake later, we we’re all getting a bit lit and I noticed a little terrarium on top of the Sushi Bar. It reminded me of my old Hermit Crab terrarium I had as a kid and figured that they probably had some pet Hermit Crabs in there’s as pets and for fun at the restaurant. Crab I made a joke to one of the hosts, “Hey! how do you prepare the Hermit Crabs?”, to which he immediately started going toward the terrarium and going for what I could know see were small normal sea crabs about three inches big, kind of like the one to the right, and he said to me, “Oh do you want one?”. I then realized, “Oh shit, he’s not kidding, these aren’t pets, they’re food!”, so I said, “Uhhh, naw, it’s cool.”

Greg, getting drunker and louder, immediately got interested in what was going on with me and the host and barked at the host to bring one of the crabs over so he can see it. Greg, being and avid fisherman, wasn’t phased by the creepy little creature, unlike Farah, who was sitting right next to Greg… She HATES creepy, crawly things, ESPECIALLY spiders, so I know that she is no fan of this buggy little spider crab. The host brings over a crab and shows it to Greg, Greg immediately grabs it from the host and it quickly escapes from Gregs palm and start crawling around and all over his hand, Farah shrieks as Greg tries to get a handle on the monster and he throws it into a half empty glass of beer that’s right in front of Farah. The crab splashes, Farah, shrieks louder, and the poor little crustachaen, who’s now submerged in Sapporo, starts frantically crawling at the side of the glass trying to get out. The host, a young Japanese guy, starts laughing and Greg quips, “You gotta get it drunk first!” Confused by Greg’s quote, I watch as Greg grabs a couple chopsticks, dives them into the glass, grabs the crab and pitches it into his mouth and starts crunching. A freaked Farah starts repeating, “OHMIGHOD! OHMIGHOD! OHMIGHOD!”, I, along with the host, start laughing hysterically… And the young host thinks Greg is a hero and starts praising him with “You da man! You da man!”. The young host gets the older host and tells him about Greg eating the crab. The older host dryly starts joking, “Oh, you at’ crab, you need antidote…” The older host grabs a bottle of something and brings it around to the outside of the bar and pours Greg a glassful… Not knowing what it was, Greg grabs the glass and chugs it down… I couldn’t tell what it was either, but it was a clear liquid, indicating that it was some sort of high octane Japanese spirit.


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