Well, we’re back from beautiful Truckee/Donner Lake, California.
I rode up with my 10 year old nephew, Nikolai who, along with his sister Karina, is a notorious button pusher. So, most of that ride with him was him pushing every friggin’ button in my Jeep. Window down, window up, window down, window up… door lock, door unlock. Radio fade rear, forward, balance left, right… with me constantly saying, “Stop! That doesn’t do anything, wait, don’t do that. No! Wait! you’re going to break that! Stop! Okay, fine, you can do that, fade the stereo back and forth, yeah, that’s sooooo exciting. Wait! No! the transmission stays in ‘Drive’!! Don’t’ touch that!” Jeez! Here, uh, play with uh… this… Yeah, I know it’s just an old dirty Starbucks cup that was under my seat, your a kid, use your imagination, there’s lots of cool things you can do with it, just play with it!.
We made it too the cabin and got settled. The first emergency was finding out that the toilet had a slow flush and plugged up easily. This resulted in an APB being put out on a plunger and everyone went searching. See! This is what I’m talking about, every toilet in the world should have a plunger right next to it, not hidden somewhere… And no, I wasn’t the one who plugged the toilet, one of the kids did it… A plunger was finally found and the problem was solved… Later one of the other kids did the same thing, and left a big brown mess in the toilet, but we found out it wasn’t plugged, the toilet was just so slow that you had to hold the handle down until everything was flushed. I was in the kitchen and I got a call from my Mom who was just checking in to see if everyone got there okay… I said, “Yeah, everything’s good,” and made some other small talk… and then she asked to speak to my sister… that’s when I found Sherry in the bathroom with all four kids huddle around and looking down into the unflushed and brown toilet with my sister giving a lesson on how to flush properly. While she was giving the lesson, I handed her the phone saying, “It’s Mom.” Sherry instinctively grabbed the phone and put it up to her head into conversation mode while she was still giving instructions to the kids, so my mom got the lesson too, “Okay everyone, the toilet doesn’t work properly, so you have to hold the handle until the poo goes down. Remember, hold handle until the poo goes down…. Hi Mom! How’s it going?”
The next day, Sunday, we we’re all getting ready to go over to Donner Lake, and so I’m applying the 58 spf lotion to my zombie looking milk white skin. I finally hit the limit of how far my arm could reach and I coaxed little Karina over to finish up my back. So, as I’m kneeling down for her to spread the lotion around, Matt pipes in with, “It’s okay honey, just pretend it’s an animal and that your applying medicine to it. Ugh! Needless to say, 12-year-old Alina was also creeped out when “Uncle Matt” asked her to lotion up his pimply back.
On Monday, July 4th, we all got up early to see the Truckee 4th of July parade. Matt and Janet skipped the parade and stayed in bed because they’re Anti-American!!! So, we make it to the parade and it’s your standard people lined up on the sides of the streets and decorated floats going by… Well, actually, they weren’t really floats, more just trucks pulling trailers… and decorated is being generous… a few trailers were decorated… One float was just some kids standing up on an empty flatbed and throwing water balloons and squirting people with those giant water guns at the people watching the parade. A lot of the trailers were throwing out Advertisemen- I mean, Candy with Business cards attached to them for the kids, so you can imagine all the candy that didn’t make it to side of the road made the kids run up and into the road dodging the trucks and trailers to get the candy. The Truckee Optimist took the opportunity of the parade to advertise their upcoming “Cannibal Cruise!!!” which was going to be a bunch of hot rod cars cruising around celebrating the Donner party having to eat each other to survive the blizzard they got trapped in or something like that. The Truckee Baptist Churches float did a fifties thing and they sang to the tune of ‘At the Hop’, …”Let’s lift Jesus UP! (and praise him) Let’s lift Jesus UP! (and praise him) Let’s lift Jesus UP! (and praise him)”. The propagand- er, I mean candy that they threw out were called “TESTAMINTS!” and each mint had a bible verse printed on the back… Clever! The Truckee Classifieds had pretty much just a little wagon trailing behind a big pickup with a couple of signs that they must’ve scribbled together that morning. Not impressed. I missed a lot of the floats/trailers because it was so boring that I spent most of my time just looking around at the women in the crowd and rating their boobs. Now, because you probably think I’m exaggerating all that above, below are some actual photos.
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