Yo! Yo! Mardy Grazzizle in da houz ya’ll – WHAT! WHAT! say yeah!!! HUP! HUP! HUP! HUP! ughhh….
February 9th 2005 @ 2:02 pm All Categories

If anybody ever tells you, “That’s just a stereotype, you shouldn’t base your judgments on stereotypes.”, ignore them… I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again… Stereotypes perpetuate themselves. Other people don’t create the stereotype, the stereotype creates the stereotype.

Last night, a few of us went downtown to the Mission Ale House for Mardi Gras. But sadly, the Ghetto has taken over downtown and has turned what could’ve been a cool party and a cool night out into a pathetic mess. Years ago, I used to go downtown for Mardi Gras when they opened up one street for a street party and not too many people knew about it… It was fun and casual, the party street was open and free, and there were bands playing and drinks flowing with only a small checkpoint at the ends of the street to keep the booze quarantined, people were dressed up, it was a small, but decent try at a New Orleans styled Mardi Gras… The next year it was a little more crowded and chaotic as word got out to the, uh, “urban” community that there was a party going on downtown for Mardi Gras. The next year, I noticed chain-link “cage” fencing being erected around the street where the Mardi Gras party is held. I knew from past experience that this “cage” meant that animals were expected to arrive and that the party was now over. And, of course, my prediction came true, the ghetto arrived and fucked everything up for the rest of us, just like they did with the South First street fairs, and Cinco De Mayo. I did a drive by the evening of the party and it was insanely overcrowded and it didn’t look like a Mardi Gras party, but just a giant hip-hop party. In the news the next day were stories of parked cars getting fucked up, store windows getting broken and quarrels with the cops… “No! Really? How uh, STEREOTYPICAL.”

Well, it’s years later, and my buddies decided to go downtown to the Mission Ale House, a bar designed after an Irish type pub, for Fat Tuesday. “Mission Ale House, cool, that’s a pub bar, that should be a fun party”, I say to myself. But when we get there the whole downtown is, again, a ghetto scene with people just wandering around Santa Clara street aimlessly and a riot squad of police trying to control them. We go into the Ale House, and it ends up being a crowded ghetto scene with shitty DJ’s spinning crappy hip-hop, stuck-up club women, and way too many Neanderthal dudes milling around. So most of the night there was spent standing in line to go outside in the back, standing in line to go back inside, standing in line for the bathroom, standing in line for a drink, as well as continuously getting bumped into by slack-jaw idiots who all thought they were WAAYYY too cool for you, and also the sadness of having to gaze at beautiful, but miserable, stuck-up looking, stone-faced women.

We ended up bailing out of that shithole and walked down to Brittania Arms which was a few blocks away… The streets were still way crowded, even though there was no street party going on, no drinks, no bands, no nothing, it was just another boring Tuesday night downtown… The ghetto was just trying to make a party out of nothing, and the cops were just trying to direct people away from the streets and get them to go home, telling everyone, “you can’t walk this way, go that way, not this way either, that way.” After a few police detours, we made it to the Brit, but nothing was going on there either, then off to the Blank club, but nothing there either, there was really nothing going on downtown regarding Mardi Gras, just a bunch of Ghetto people hanging out in the street. We finally decided to bail out and get the Hell out of there.

Oh!!! And remember that part about “Stereotypes perpetuate themselves.” My friend, John, got his car fucked up… Something to the effect of someone jumping on his hood or something… I still have to talk to him to find out the details. Yeah, so the Ghetto is the Ghetto, if you act like animals, you get labeled as animals. One sight at the Mission was amusing, a beautiful girl, all dressed up cute and gorgeous, trailing behind her boyfriend who was walking a few steps in front of her and pretty much ignoring her, he was dressed up in his trashy Ghetto garb(age), baggy shirt, backward baseball cap, shit I wear when I’m cleaning the house and taking out the garbage… She had that same pissy look on her face that all the girls had, and he was just walking in front of her with her trailing behind in this crowded bar, he never looked back to check on her, or held her hand, or anything… AND SHE WAS SUPER CUTE! If it was me, I’d be ALL lovey with her, holding her hand and making sure she was okay in the crowd, that dude was a moron… She could do better, and he SHOULD be doing worse. I don’t get this world at all… Chicks always whining about wanting a nice guy, then the reality that is, chicks like assholes (another stereotype that continues to perpetuate itself.)… The only way I knew she was with him is that she kept grabbing for the back of his shirt to try and keep up with him.

So then, trying to leave downtown, the cops, knowing that the Ghetto can’t be trusted to be civilized and behave themselves, directed all traffic away from downtown, up Coleman to Highway 880… All turns were blocked, so it was a 45 minute traffic jam just to get the Hell out of and escape Downtown San Jose.

So, scratch the downtown Mardi Gras party off the list too… Along with Cinco De Mayo, and the South First Street fair (although, the Ghetto has probably already permanently cancelled the South First outdoor party, last time I went to one it was a crowded ghetto party mess and a pretty scary scene.)

While leaving downtown and walking down Santa Clara street, we noticed a huge Ghetto crowd at “Toons” (used to be a rock and roll bar). “Toons” was completely packed and out front were a hundred Ghetto people mobbing the entrance trying to get in… John fantasized about firing one or two RPG missiles right into the doorway… That mental image was the only thing that made me feel joy that night.

-Sean

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